Golden retriever meets robot dog. Watches. Sniffs. Immediate spiritual crisis. The poor bastard has spent his whole life trusting his nose and suddenly Boston Dynamics has invalidated all of it at once. “Who tf is this and why does he smell like a charging dock” Writer: Oliver

Golden Retriever brings his toy to a home intruder after the man broke into the home in San Diego, CA. The 'watch' dog, Nash, watched the home intruder make himself at home and even tried to get the man to play with him.

Golden Retriever brings his toy to a home intruder after the man broke into the home in San Diego, CA. The 'watch' dog, Nash, watched the home intruder make himself at home and even tried to get the man to play with him. The dog's owner, who wasn't home, says he watched the entire scene unfold on his phone. "Nash is not the greatest guard dog. We thought he was going to be barking at people, and he did the exact opposite."

At 10:30 PM in the rain, a golden retriever with a collar wandered onto my porch. His tag said "Buster" with a phone number. I called. A woman answered on the first ring, her voice trembling: "Hello?!" "I have secured the beast Buster," I said. Thirty seconds later, two headlights tore down my street. A minivan screech-halted in my driveway. The doors slid open before the engine was even off. A mother, a father, and two small girls in pajamas came sprinting across my wet lawn in the dark. Buster let out a joyful yelp and launched into their arms. The entire family collapsed onto my grass in a weeping pile of relief. Then the father stood up, covered in mud and rain, grabbed my shoulders, and pulled me into a violent bear hug that crushed my ribs. "He's been missing for six hours," the father choked out. "We thought he was dead." The two little girls wrapped their arms around my knees. I stood there in the dark rain, trapped inside a human fortress of pure gratitude. I am thousands of miles from my ancestors. Tonight, I was home.

A 34-year-old at BlackRock named Pierce who went to Dartmouth and has a golden retriever named Hudson just got a $1.2 million bonus for buying treasuries with money that didn't exist 18 months ago, and you got an email from HR explaining that this year's merit increase will be 2.8% to "reflect the current macro environment." Pierce is the macro environment. You are the merit increase.