Matthias Schmidt(@eurofounder):Perfect Saturday night out in London as a female: 6pm - Apply seven layers of fake tan and glue on eyelashes 7pm - Put on a tiny pink dress and no jacket (it’s 6°C and raining outside) 8pm - Wait for Sharia patrol to leave your street, then head to the pub 9pm - Spend £96 on two espresso martinis 10pm - A Pakistani man grabs your ass, apologize to him for wearing such a revealing outfit 11pm - Head to the club, wait 45 minutes in a line to get in 2am - Watch five British men fight outside McDonalds 4am - Go home with a random bald man with three missing teeth 5am - Have terrible sex and create a reminder to purchase a morning-after pill London nightlife is simply unmatched

2026.10.24 16:52

Perfect Saturday night out in London as a female: 6pm - Apply seven layers of fake tan and glue on eyelashes 7pm - Put on a tiny pink dress and no jacket (it’s 6°C and raining outside) 8pm - Wait for Sharia patrol to leave your street, then head to the pub 9pm - Spend £96 on two espresso martinis 10pm - A Pakistani man grabs your ass, apologize to him for wearing such a revealing outfit 11pm - Head to the club, wait 45 minutes in a line to get in 2am - Watch five British men fight outside McDonalds 4am - Go home with a random bald man with three missing teeth 5am - Have terrible sex and create a reminder to purchase a morning-after pill London nightlife is simply unmatched

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