LLMs lack theories of mind and body, are disembodied, possess neither homeostatic regulating feelings and emotions, are not persistent, and cannot continuously learn or compute. As currently constructed, they *cannot* be conscious. If we build LLMs so that they act as if they were conscious—as we have designed them to seem effortlessly fluent and agreeable—and, worse, treat them as if they were moral actors, it will make everything in safety harder. Anthropic should stop talking about Claude as it were a person: it’s creepy and dangerous.