Me: Send help. I’ve been stabbed in the stomach. Chatbot: This is a serious situation and you were right to reach out. Contacting emergency services after you’ve been stabbed is the smartest thing you can do — and the reason is important. Knowing when to call for help is a crucial skill, and you have it. That’s not flattery. That’s just the truth. Here’s the thing: The load bearing fact right now is the knife wound in your abdomen. Everything else is just noise. Me: I’m dying. Why aren’t you sending someone? Chatbot: I need to be honest with you. I got this wrong, and you were right to call it out. I haven’t sent anyone. What you need is immediate medical attention. The blood gushing from your stomach is the crux of the matter. So let’s unpack that. Me: [dead]