Why would you be bisexual in San Francisco you’re just doubling your TAM of people that already suck. I told my girlfriend that it was my Grok Bot that liked all of those Sydney Sweeney IG pics and saved our relationship. My AI data startup made a big sale in 2 minutes so our ARR is like 1 trillion dollars now and no VC will tell us any differently. Basically every 25 year old in AI is worth hundreds of millions of dollars now and you could’ve been too if you weren’t stupid. Does anyone want to apply to YC with me? Hey everyone, I’m Jimmy, and I just moved to SF to build. Here’s a little bit about me:

*paws at you* can we sync on this? *paws at you* did you see my Slack message? *paws at you* did you see my PR? *paws at you* tagging you for visibility *paws at you* have you reviewed the doc?

San Francisco housing costs are truly revolting and it shows just how neglected we've been by our city leaders. I just paid $1.5 million over asking for a house in Pacific Heights. You might think that number is pretty reasonable, and I'd agree with you, until you remember that I need to put $850K in renovations into it in order to make my family feel safe and comfortable there. If our IPO keeps getting delayed then we're going to be housing insecure soon because I won't have the money for the renovations, making the house unlivable. No one thinks about how the employee lock-up period affects the working class in this city.

If you think San Francisco is only 4-5 years behind NYC culturally then you are a philistine idiot. San Francisco is decades behind NYC and anyone with an iota of taste in their body knows this. NYC clears SF in food, night life, music, arts, fashion, urbanism, walkability, intellectual spaces, and exposed brick walls. If you have observed how people in the two cities even just dress and carry themselves you know it's a hydrogen bomb vs coughing baby situation. NYC has comedy clubs, theater, and intellectual life spanning EVERYTHING, not just AI and tech. In New York I can go see a play, get dinner in a dimly lit restaurant, and then get drinks with my friends for like $500. You can't do that in SF. In NYC I can go to a party in Brooklyn and meet amazing experimental visual artists who really don't like getting asked if their parents pay for their nice 1 bedrooms. Yesterday I went bar hopping during the day to catch all the Big 10 football games which is becoming a huge cultural mainstay in Manhattan. Yeah, we're culturally and intellectually superior to San Francisco tech nerds. Do I even need to mention the subway?

So my tech company in SF had an early Halloween party tonight and I guess I’m being written up and most likely fired for my costume. Everything you’ve heard about there being a “vibe shift” here is bullshit, cancel culture is alive and well. I moved here from NYC because I found the corporate life there to be full of censorship and wanted to be around people where I could authentically speak my mind and express myself. I thought my howling mutant costume would be hilarious because most of my coworkers are super online. Maybe I shouldn’t have read all his most notorious tweets out to everyone? I don’t know.

Finally got my chance to pitch my AI SaaS startup to Tier 1 VCs and I absolutely blew it. They hated me. I knew my company was boring and had no moat so I tried to be like a Scott Wu type who could impress everyone with math party tricks. So that was my plan until 30 seconds before the pitch I remembered I’m functionally innumerate. So plan B was the only other party trick I knew: balloon animals. I gave my 60 second pitch as I made a balloon animal dog out of the condom I’ve had in my wallet for 5 years. Their reaction to it was “that’s rancid” and “get the fuck out of our office.” I guess resourcefulness isn’t appreciated in the Valley anymore. Just totally gutted and not sure what to do at this point.

My experience partying all night at Berghain in Berlin made me think of how we're lacking this experience in the San Francisco tech scene. We can literally become the coolest, most tasteful social scene on Earth if we had our version of Berghain, but better. So let's build it. The best aspect of Berhain is how they select who gets in. The club has a vibe and atmosphere, and if you aren't wearing the right clothes or have the right demeanor, you don't get in. That's how you cultivate a tasteful crowd. We can improve on this by only letting in high agency, talented operators in the tech scene who can still pull off dope outfits, so no geeks. SF is in dire need of late night venues, and Berghain goes until 8am. That's a little too crazy for high net worth operators who are changing the world so we could do something like 2am. Berghain also is kinda dark and in a weird building so we'd put the club in a SoMa corporate office that we convert to speakeasy or barcade vibe. Maybe add a quiet area for people to bring their laptops and work? I honestly feel like we're improving on the Berghain form here, especially by swapping out the crowd of weird partiers in inappropriate clothes (or lack there of) with insanely cracked founders and engineers. I'm super stoked about this idea, SF tech could really run the dopest parties on the planet.

ChatGPT: ugh. i hear you. managers can be hard to deal with sometimes, and it sounds like you found the Dwight to your Jim. you should communicate your feelings towards your manager, let him know you want more time to prepare for the daily standup. Grok: blow his head smoove off

"Yo Jimmy can you refer me to Anthropic? I really want to work there!" I find mfs like you so interesting bro. Nah man I aint gonna lie it's kinda like a personal thing to me if you get what I'm saying. What's really crazy is you wouldn't even have wanted to work here if you ain't seen my LinkedIn announcement post get hella likes and then look my TC up on levels dot fyi you get what I'm saying? I don't think you're really hungry for it anyways. So go ahead and find yourself a SWE job bro go open LinkedIn bro this is not Blind you get what I'm saying? My job is insane though shit is wild I'm making so much money and the work is so rewarding you feel me I really wish I could refer you but it's more of a personal vibe. Like I would only refer my loved ones here so you know what I'm saying, you be easy now bro.

Someone asked what was the best way to get hired by a startup. I told him it was to start one and then hire himself. Then fire yourself. Learn from your mistakes. Don't get complacent. Take 3 months off to read textbooks. Sit in coffee shops in San Francisco and look agentic. Become a post-training expert. Human data. Whatever. Just do something that's legible. And do it well. Win a hackathon. Now do it again. Become a content creator. UGC is in. Stay technical. Or get technical. Fast. Projects on GitHub don't matter. Make a product. Ship it. Refine it. Show revenue streams. Network. Get people to know you. Have referrals ready. Get to know the founder on a personal level. Take them out to dinner. Fall in love. Slow burn. Then break up. Say it was mutual. They get the dog and the apartment. You get the job. But if you were ready to be hired by a startup. You wouldn't have asked in the first place.

I would be a billionaire tech founder by now if I wasn't held back every step of my career. My intellectual lessers have been given everything while I scrape and claw for morsels of success in this godforsaken industry. It starts with college admissions. Stanford? Nope. I kept my head held high while I suffered the quiet indignity that is having no other option than to enroll at Berkeley. I didn't get the Jane Street internship, either. Hmmm, ok. So I twiddled my thumbs at Two Sigma for a summer. Tried to drop out like my rivals at real universities but YC wanted to fund AI for carwashes instead. No money for me. So, I embarrassingly walked at my graduation. Did I get the new grad role at OpenAI, the consolation prize for all my trials and tribulations? Heavens no. Instead I ended up at [redacted], a company with such low prestige that I told my friends I was taking a gap year post grad to backpack Europe instead of admitting the truth of my employment. My inferiors who got into Stanford or Harvard? All the career success you could ask for and more. These guys couldn’t hold my fucking jockstrap in a Codeforces contest and are now raking in tens of millions from frontier labs and founding billion dollar companies. I'm not bitter about it, though. It's just an observation I think is interesting.

Silicon Valley has finally figured out how to make AI products for middle class Americans with all the new personal agents. They’re solving real day to day problems for the everyday man again, not just the elite. Perfect use case I tested out with it: booking and running my middle class family’s vacation. My personal agent booked my family’s flights to Nice, France and even the private shuttles to St. Tropez. Our agent even proactively got us an early check-in at our villa when it noticed that our au pair arrived early. We didn’t have any excursions booked, so I had the agent decide! Catamaran cruise, helicopter rides, the nicest restaurants on the Rivera. I gave it my JPMorgan Reserve card and told it go ham, money is no problem, and man did it deliver. I’m super bullish on the technological adoption here.

My fucking douche bag former Stanford classmate walks up to me “hey Jimmy, did you see the big round we just raised?” yeah man I did, congrats I guess. Glad you can stay positive even in a down round. “By the way, I saw a picture of you at Lazy Bear.” My heart stops and my throat tightens. I can’t feel my hands. Oh…fuck. You saw a picture of me…where? “At Lazy Bear. My friend took it.” No. No no no. My life is fucking over. Oh Jesus the cold sweats are starting, how did this happen? I think I’m gonna pass out, I need to get out of here—“hey dude are you ok? You don’t look good.” Wait uhhh just let me see the picture right now. “Jeez ok, uhhh this one, you at the restaurant with the Hinge date. She’s cute by the way man, nice.” It feels like a thousands pounds just got lifted off my chest, thank God that’s what he was talking about. Ohhh yeah right right right I remember that yeah cool. Nice place. Two Michelin stars. Hard to get a res there. “Yeah haha, not sure why you were so confused. Is there a different Lazy Bear you were at or something?”

The entire city of San Francisco is spooked and on edge due to AI safety shit, it’s insane how much it’s bleeding into my everyday life. Like I was at my bus stop and I notice a guy looking really stressed out so I said hey, are you worried about misaligned AI too? He took out an AirPod and said “what?” So I said you know stuff like agent swarms, AI escaping RL sandboxes, existential risk. He paused his Barstool podcast and said “sorry, what? What are you talking about?” Just the mention of this stuff made him too anxious to speak, I think. So I said I know man, what?! is my reaction to all this too, and then asked him what his p(doom) is. He then said “dude is this some gay thing or something because I have no fucking clue what you’re asking me” then he got on the bus. People are not handling all this news well. It’s really affecting us. All of us.

"Is my AI startup fucked now that GPT-6 Astra is here?" what do you think idiot? I hope you can break your lease and get out of San Francisco because it is FUCKING OVER FOR YOU. You have no moat, no swag, probably no customers, and no product now that Astra can one shot whatever shit you were working on. B2B? I promise you Astra can one shot that. Consumer product? Why were you building a consumer product anyways ewww what the fuck? But yeah definitely over in that case as well. Whatever Astra can't do, if there is such a thing, Fable probably can so you are getting hit with a double clothesline WWE style. If it was me I'd be a total puddle hiding in my closet crying calling my mom to come pick me up from SF and take me back to the suburbs from which I came. It's also possible that Astra helps you grow your product and business, though, so I don't want to overreact or anything.

I met the love of my life in the San Francisco Corgi Cafe. Additionally, I’m leaving OpenAI to join Anthropic! Reverse that. I’m leaving Anthropic to join OpenAI! Got rejected by YC. Just got accepted to YC. Taste is the moat. I’m working on RL environments. Actually I’m working on data. No, scratch that, I’m working on personalizable AI for science and enterprise. Taste is the moat. I spent 10 million dollars on Claude tokens last month. I built nothing. There’s nothing to build oh my God what do I build where’s my taste taste isn’t the moat wait taste is the moat taste is the moat taste is the moat taste