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Eli Lebowicz
@EliLebowicz
Jewish Comedian. Co-creator of JSketch. Gelilah Guy. I also argue with antisemites since the world went and lost its mind. Visit to book a show.
4.3K Following    18.5K Followers
Yeah I’m sure this guy has always meant well.
Yes. Israel is one of the greatest foreign policy threats to the US; yet I'm being prosecuted by the US gov. for saying that.
In one pocket you should have a note that says I am nothing but dust and ashes and in the other pocket a note that says that the NBA was created for me.
Adam Silver says next season’s schedule is on hold until LeBron makes his decision ⏳👀 "We have to finish up the schedule and where LeBron plays affects the schedule ... opening week, Christmas. So I need him to make a decision." (via Game Plan, @CNBCSport @boardroom)
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Rebbe Akiva didn’t learn any Torah until he was 40.
Bron at 41 holding up the NBA schedule 😂😂😂😂😂😂😂
In Stairway to Heaven, there’s a line that sounds like he’s saying “and if you listen very hard…the Jew will bother you a lot.” And we’ve reached a point in society that those will probably be the official lyrics now.
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And people say try to say he’s not frum…
😅 Sen. Chuck Schumer was silent when @jacob_wass asked him about farting on the Senate floor.
New heter just dropped
Breathing NYC's smoky air is equal to puffing 10 whole cigarettes, expert warns
Need about $700 more for co-sponsoring Tefillin for someone who has been borrowing thus far.
Looking for a potential sponsor or co-sponsors for a pair of Tefillin for guys who have been borrowing for a while. Cost would be $1000. PM me if you’re interested in contributing.
When your friend’s kid’s bris gets pushed off and they decide to make it meat during the 9 Days
I think they say Jews control FIFA because players during a penalty kick look a whole lot like men at a bris
Camp staff and 7-year-olds keeping the walkie-talkie industry alive.
It’s so weird how “independent journalists” always have the same leftist/far right takes.
Everyone: This Daylight Savings Time won’t let me go to minyan in the morning. Me: What about my Saturday night winter comedy gigs?
“You want like 7 pieces of challah?” “No I can’t have that much.” “What if I make into French toast?” “Fine.”
This should get way more likes.
Sneaking into The Odyssey with 28 of my friends by cramming into a giant wooden horse and leaving it outside an IMAX with a note saying it’s a gift.
{At local JCC} “Yes, that side entrance is gonna be closed for a while. It’s for security, with everything going on…” “I understand. You’re gonna keep it closed until antisemitism has been solved.”
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They say that Aharon HaKohen died on Rosh Chodesh Av, the beginning of the 9 Days. With his death, the Bnei Yisrael lost the clouds of protection in the desert. Aharon was said to be someone who was a Rodef Shalom and Ohev Shalom, someone who tried to make peace between arguing parties, even going as far as to lie to each party that the other one wanted to reconcile. It doesn’t seem accidental that protection from harm in the desert for the Bnei Yisrael was in the merit of the man who encouraged agreeableness between people. And while we are still mastering the pastime of millennia-old internal fighting, we wonder why the nations of the world every few decades decide that the Jews are so horrible. Maybe for the next 9 days, when you feel the urge to post or yell at your fellow member of the tribe, you remember that we are all one, even if sure doesn’t feel like it.
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Looking for a potential sponsor or co-sponsors for a pair of Tefillin for guys who have been borrowing for a while. Cost would be $1000. PM me if you’re interested in contributing.
“I talk about how much I hate Israel as much as I can and I’m Jewish. I also feel perfectly safe in New York.” Plenty of people with almost no self-awareness on here.