Dear @KamalaHarris, I was going to refer you to eat a bag of dicks. But that’s not the type of person I am. I just did the math and it turns out that USAID budget cuts have actually killed 67 billion people so far. I generated that math the same way that the person generated the figure that you mentioned. I made it up out of thin air. Anyway, love ya 💋

Yahoo finance teams up with @Bloomberg to claim that the best selling electric truck in the world is the biggest flop in automotive history. Now I’ve never been accused of counting numbers much…. But wouldn’t the second, third, fourth, fifth, or sixth best selling electric truck be a more likely candidate for the biggest flop?

Gosh, I wonder what kind of car this is? Well, one thing for sure, we know it’s not a Tesla. If it was a Tesla, then that would be the lead headline across the nation. If it’s not a Tesla, it simply doesn’t matter who made the car because it’s not the car’s fault.

Hey @nytimes, Breaking story, The driver of this Ford claims they were using Bluecruise the entire time and they are NOT responsible for any of the damage to the front lawn of this house. The driver said it so that automatically means it’s an established fact that can be printed as a headline. We will stand by for your story.

Atlanta, GA (JUN.18.2026)- In all truth, it’s becoming damn near impossible to keep the Waymo versus firetruck truck videos sorted out. Staff at The Sunset Project™️ seem to be logging the same data every four hours. Here’s what this investigation revealed: -The firetruck with lights and sirens blaring crossed the double yellow to pass the stopped traffic. -As it approached the intersection, the Waymo kept coming right at it and challenged it to a head on collision. -The Waymo did not respond to the lights and sirens. -You’ll see that the copilot of the firetruck gets out to guide the fire backwards so that it can attempt to go around the Waymo -As the firetruck reverses, the Waymo surges forward to assert its dominance. -Finally, the firetruck engineer felt he had enough gap to try to get around the Waymo. The mainstream media picks up on these stories about 5% of the time. Not sure how they decide which ones are important and which ones are not. Then Waymo responds and explains how much they learned from the incident. Then the same incident keeps happening every four hours like clockwork. We are slowly getting better at guessing which stories will be picked up by the national media and this one definitely has a chance after it makes the local news in Atlanta. Notes: The video is sped to 1.5X for her pleasure) (the audio was replaced because every video on the Internet is playing the same song and it’s going to cause people to commit suicide). #NeedIntelligence# #NeedInference# #ManilaWeHaveAProblem#