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๐™ˆ๐˜ฟโ˜…
@MDkabir662843
1.2K Following    1.7K Followers
Not sure who still needs to hear this but; โ€œHEALTHCARE BEFORE DATA CENTERSโ€
Love getting high with the boys, they donโ€™t stop rolling till everyone passes out.
Any other neurodivergent people feel like they underreact to things youโ€™re โ€œsupposedโ€ to have a huge emotional reaction toโ€”death, breakups, terrible newsโ€”but then completely lose it over things everyone else thinks arenโ€™t a big deal?
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some niggas arenโ€™t chasing a lifestyle. theyโ€™re trying to change a family history.
โ€œAuthors, please stop writing this random thing I personally donโ€™t likeโ€”โ€œ I will fuck your dad.
Agent left Nitro_Camden speechless after securing him his first-ever brand deal, giving him a chance to live comfortably after being kicked out of his home at just 18 โค๏ธ๐Ÿ™
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Focused on winning. Unavailable for all other reasons.
Ever hacked the GTA game, gotten everything you wanted but still the game felt boring, that's the real simulation we're living in
My girlfriend sent me a screenshot of her conversation with her best friend. She was complaining about me. Nothing unusual. Then I noticed something. Her best friend had replied: โ€œGirl, just leave him.โ€ My girlfriend answered: โ€œI canโ€™t. He knows too much.โ€ I immediately asked: โ€œKnows too much about what?โ€ She stopped typing. Then called me. She said, โ€œItโ€™s not what you think.โ€ Which, honestly, is the worst sentence anyone can hear. I asked her what she meant. She said she was talking about a surprise. I didnโ€™t believe her. Then she said: โ€œOkay. Come downstairs.โ€ I went outside. Her best friend was waiting there. With a cake. I thought they were throwing me a surprise birthday party. Then I remembered my birthday was three months away. I looked at both of them. Nobody spoke. Finally, her best friend said: โ€œOkay, this isnโ€™t how we planned it.โ€ I asked what wasnโ€™t how they planned it. My girlfriend sighed. Then handed me an envelope. Inside was a hotel reservation. For two people. I looked at her. She said: โ€œPlease donโ€™t get mad.โ€ I said: โ€œWho am I supposed to be mad at?โ€ She pointed behind me. Her mother was standing there. Holding luggage.
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Guys iโ€™m in a very heated debate Would it be easier to poop out a pineapple or pee a grape ๐Ÿ˜‘
๐Ÿšจ BACK WITH A BANG! ๐ŸŽ‡ A perfect first half back to Premier League action for #Arsenal# as Saka ๐Ÿด๓ ง๓ ข๓ ฅ๓ ฎ๓ ง๓ ฟ and Havertz ๐Ÿ‡ฉ๐Ÿ‡ช are on point to put Arsenal 2-0 up at the break against Coventry! ๐Ÿ‘
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My sister, who bakes for a living out of her house, watched me pull butter straight from the fridge and cream it with sugar while it was still cold and hard, resistant against the mixer. "How long did that sit out?" "It didn't. I just took it out." She stopped what she was doing entirely. "That's the whole thing, right there." "It's just butter. I figured room temperature was more of a suggestion." "Room temperature butter traps air when you cream it. That trapped air is what holds the dough's structure while it bakes, before the butter fully melts. Cold butter doesn't trap nearly as much โ€” it just melts fast and flat the second it hits heat, with nothing holding the dough up while that happens." She had me start over, butter properly softened this time, forty-five minutes on the counter instead of straight from the fridge. Same recipe, same oven, same tray. The cookies came out of the oven noticeably domed, soft in the center, nothing like the thin discs I'd been pulling out for months. I'd blamed my oven temperature, my baking soda's freshness, the altitude of my apartment, everything except the twenty minutes of patience I kept skipping every single time I decided I didn't feel like waiting for butter to soften.
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I just heard someone refer to autistic burnout as a workplace injury and Iโ€ฆ ๐Ÿคฏ๏ฟผ
Tbh As an employee, hearing the unadulterated opinions of old wealthy people at a country club is so much more soul-sucking than I couldโ€™ve imagined.