Softboy
@softboywin
SWAG BOY || 13-06-2026๐๏ธ|| Relatable sht || @fwsoftboy
2.3K Following 10.7K Followers
A while ago I saw someone say that when people use social media, they all seem to block their parents first.
I thought about it and felt like I should probably do that too.
So I went to search for my mom's account.
And found out...
she already blocked me first.
???? MOM????๐ญ
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If someone goes straight in for a French kiss,
it's definitely not their first kiss ๐
I really โdamn thatโs crazyโ my coworker to death all day..even throw in a โwow are you serious?โ To spice it up
My little bro saw me come home looking completely dead.
He asked, 'Are you getting yelled at work all day?'
I was too tired to explain, so I just said, 'Kinda.'__
Then he quietly went to his room, came back and handed me some note.
Then donโt go tomorrow. Here, take these.'
I counted them. Itโs twenty seven dollar.
In my whole life, Iโve never seen twenty five dollar worth more than this."๐ญ๐ซ
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I pretended to be sick so I wouldn't have to go to school. Mom pretended to be healthy so she could go to work.
I get annoyed by shit like.. if a actress got a bob in a movie and they do a flashback to when she was little and she had a bob then too
my coworker passed away yesterday and they were about to fire him for not showing up, these jobs do not gaf about you broโฆ. choose yourself.
I earn $30,000 a month.
One day I wanted to take leave and my boss said:
'Take 1 day off and weโll deduct $500.'
So I told my boss: 'Okay Iโll take 30 days off.
Remember to pay me $15,000 next month.๐๐ค
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I lost my key fob for my apartment complex. They charge $85 for a replacement. I went on amazon and found a blank fob for $10, brought that bitch into the office and told them itโs not working and they swapped me out. Canโt believe these mfโs tried to rape my pockets like that lmao
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Yesterday, i saw a lizard next to the coffee maker and the cashier said "no worries that's just marvin, he likes the smell"
Do you ever just want someone to come over, sit on the floor beside you, and exist together for a few hours?
How did we let the economy reach a point where we don't actually own anything anymore? We rent our homes, lease our cars, subscribe to our software, and pay monthly fees just to exist. Is the end game of modern capitalism really to turn human life into one long, inescapable micro-transaction?
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How am tryna kiss my hoeee anywhere ๐ฅน
BLACK WEED SMOKERS LEAVE TEXAS! They are trying to trap you and they WILL DO IT BY ANY MEANS. Law enforcement is out to get YOU.๏ฟผ
The pristine moment you remember, "wait i can just this person".
why are stoner girls always moisturized, smell like incense, have amazing skin, cool as fuck style, know a lot about cool rocks and shit and then stoner boys just smell bad
Sometimes teenagers are jerks and sometimes right before your 17yo goes to bed, he walks by you and randomly says, "Ten out of ten mother. Would have as my mother again."
Bitches always complain when you fuck them hard, but why is she screaming go hard ? ๐๐ญ
looking like shit increases your chances of running into someone you know at the store by at least 90%
I put on perfume every night after my shower. The girls that get it, get it.
